The P-Word and What Do We Do About It?

I just read this awesome article by John Scalzi presenting a somewhat overly simple yet incredibly eloquent analogy to explain how privilege works in society. Go read it. (Yes, it's a really simple analogy, that's why it's an analogy and not a treatise on the subject. Rhetoric is a thing we use to communicate; let's not get all huffy and post-structuralist on it just yet).

In the comments, there's this common theme of "ok, so I get it [sort of], now what do you want me to do about it?" and to those comments, my first reaction is - I don't think you actually grok what the man just wrote, so maybe... read it again and then we can chat? Maybe? This comment of course comes on the heels of those who totally do not get it at all (ever) who then point out how people with 'higher difficulty settings' complain too much... and it's like, who here is complaining? Oh wait. I remember. You guys at the easy difficulty settings are whining about how hard it is to know what to do or how even though it's easier for you, you still don't automatically win... or something? I don't actually know what those folks are complaining about.

So, now that folks have read it [again] and the grok is sinking in to the brain, we are still left with the question: What do we, as members of a society*, do about privilege? And, what role, if any, do those of us at varying difficulty levels have to play in the games of others who may be playing on a harder setting?

I therefore submit the Bee-Approved Action Plan:

1. Not everyone gets it yet (and by everyone, I really do mean, everyone - not just those heterosexual, cisgendered, able-bodied, white, middle-class+ men types who are, despite the whiners, not the Boogey Man). Therefore, the first step is spread the word! Consciousness Raising is a real and valuable form of activism. It helps. I promise. The more people who really get it, the better off we as a society are.

2. Ok, so your consciousness is raised and you are raising consciousnesses! Hooray! You can stop there. Really. That's ok. I'm being totally serious. While it would be nice if we did, not everyone needs to fight for social justice - work toward it, yes, but the fighting part? With the yelling, and the pain, and the heartbreak? That can be done by those with the fire in their bellies. If you don't have that fire in your belly, that is OK. You can still help by passively knowing what's going on in the world around and using that knowledge to inform your personal choices and maybe every once in a while talking about that knowledge with friends/acquaintances/loved ones. And, as always, Don't be a Jerk (which has nothing to do with privledge but always bears repeating).

2.a. Good, you say, But... what are these "personal choices" of which you speak? SO GLAD you asked! Personal choices go from the big stuff like who/what to vote for in elections** to little stuff like how you react to strangers on the street. On the voting side of things, stuff that helps the poor is generally a good place to start. Programs like Healthy Start and Head Start, programs that increase access to healthcare for everyone (especially women***), programs that aim to reduce violence, programs that promote education/reading/science/math, all of those programs that have at their core a goal of increasing opportunity and decreasing negative social and health outcomes are basically our society's best weapons against basically everything bad. (Yeah, they don't always succeed, but as a person who professionally manages federal tax money for a few of those programs, I can tell you that the purse strings are tighter than you think they are and that those dollars are tied to results).

Ok, so you're voting! Good! You are doing better than most people. What next? Well, how about the choices you make with regard to how you treat others? When you see someone whose gender expression confuses you, maybe instead of being a jerk to that person, just treat them with respect and common courtesy? Or what if you see someone who looks like they're poorer than you, or less healthy/abled than you, or perhaps has darker skin than you or any other thing that makes you think that maybe you are playing at an easier or even just different difficulty level? Treat them with respect and common courtesy! And those people who look like they are playing at an easier difficulty level than you are? Treat them with common courtesy and respect! Those are oddly easier said than done, so keep the commitment at the front of your mind until it becomes second nature and then keep it there anyway.

All well and good, you say, but those are kind of on the 'duh' end of the spectrum, what about the hard stuff? Ah yes. The Hard Stuff. What if, like me, you sometimes are in a position to make hiring decisions? What do you do in those mythical situations wherein you have two equally qualified applicants but one is obviously playing at an easier difficulty setting than the other - what do you do? Here is where it gets tough. This is where I say 1. as a hiring manager, you have a responsibility to make the best hiring choice you can make, and 2. I don't actually think this ever happens in the real world - two candidates are never identical, and therefore 3. when you make that decision, just keep all of the stuff about privilege in mind and examine your own thought process while making that choice. For example, do you think the gender-conforming white lady who is able bodied will "fit in better" in your office culture than the non-gender conforming person of color who maybe has a disability? Why is that? Is that an office culture that you want to perpetuate? Think on it. Dredge up all of the gunk in your soul. Then make a choice that you feel confident is the best for your company.

Everything we do includes a choice - where we shop and what we buy, where we live, where we work, what we do for fun - everything. So, understand in your soul that some people are playing on easy mode and some people are playing on Oh-God-Why?! hard mode, and that some people are playing on all of the various modes in between, and know, deep in your soul, that your experience is your own, and own that experience but try your hardest to not assume that your experience is the one that everyone faces. Know that for some people, just existing in this world is plain old harder than it is for you and take that into account when you make your choices.

3. So what if you have that fire in your belly? AWESOME! Now what? You can start small by taking civic engagement just one step further; don't just vote, but write a letter to your congress person. Go to a protest. Give money to an organization that works to advance the rights/access/education of all people. Collect signatures for ballot initiatives. Hold a fundraiser for one of those awesome organizations. Volunteer for one of those organizations. Think about your specific talents and gifts and how you can best use those to make the world a better place. Maybe that means making the fight to end oppression and make the world a better place your profession, maybe that means you answer phones/write thank you notes for 2 hours a week at a small non-profit. Whatever it is, do what you can do to feed that fire.

4. Really, there is no 4 - that's all I got. It's not rocket science, really. The hard part is grasping the concept and getting past your own shpilkus. The hard part is sticking with your commitment to making the world a better place for everyone.

Now, go forth and rock!

*Basic assumption time: This post assumes that folks are interested in a better world, a world in which everyone is respected, healthy, and loved. A world in which no child goes to bed hungry. A world that might not always be fair, but that at least strives toward fairness. This post assumes that when a society comes together to raise the lowest common denominator, everyone benefits. If you don't fundementally agree with those things, then... um... why are you reading this?
**Whether or not you vote is not a choice here - in a democratic society, everyone who is able to vote needs to vote.
*** And especially reproductive healthcare. For better or worse, women's health matters a lot, on a population wide scale probably more than anyone else's since women are usually the ones who make all of the new people and for better or worse, a woman's physical health is one of the greatest indicators of her future children's health (and their children, and their children's children, et al). Yeah, not all of us with wombs intend to use them to make people and yes, not all women have wombs or the other necessary people making parts, and yes, sometimes people who aren't women do have wombs and sometimes they use them to make people - but on the population scale, specificity of identity and experience goes out the window.